scar

i always liked the rain...i wanted every drop to consume me and my soul...it gives me peace of mind and some time to reflect...that is until now..

i suddenly felt lost and drowning..i just can't breathe. so many thoughts consume my mind that i didn't know what to think of first. it seems like every raindrop contains an emotion i just can't handle. some parts of me wanted to feel numb..some of it wanted to cry..some wanted to scream..looking at the dark sky is like looking at the horizon waiting to swallow me whole.and i feel so helpless.the whistling wind sound like its laughing at me..

the pouring rain and rain clouds scares me now...i ran out of sanity and i just feel so alone. i need to find a place  where i can shout these fear, these heavy emotion the rain brings me..

then i look back, i saw a blurry scene..then i remembered what made me felt this way...it was an awful sight..it was hell...not worth remembering...i hope i could just snap my fingers or close my eyes after which everything will be back to how it is then...

from this day on i will always have a scarred vision of rain...a heavy heart...and i think im no longer sane...